By Ashmal Khan
Abstract:
Codependency is a pervasive and complex issue affecting mental health, relationships, and overall well-being. This article explores the concept of codependency, its characteristics, causes, and treatment.
Introduction:
Codependency is a relationship dynamic in which the person involved is mentally,
physically, and emotionally reliant on the other. This person assumes the role of “caregiver”, sacrificing their own needs and well-being for the other (taker). Codependency can exist not only between romantic partners but also between parent and child, siblings, family members, and friends. The term “Codependency” was originally coined to describe partners in chemical dependency.
Traits of Codependency:
Givers tend to be overly responsible, often making excuses for the taker.
Low self-esteem.
They are often the one who apologises even if it's not their fault.
They usually refuse to acknowledge their partner's flaws and focus only on good
traits.
Ignoring behaviour that harms you.
Problems with setting boundaries.
Takers are often struggling with serious issues such as emotional immaturity, mental health problems, and addiction.
A strong need to control others.
Extreme need for approval and recognition.
Poor communications.
Lying/dishonesty
Feeling guilty when focusing on your own needs or anything outside your
relationship.
However, simply being reliant on someone does not mean you are codependent.
Codependency exists only when one person gives more than the other, creating an
imbalance.
Causes of Codependency:
People with codependency are said to have been raised among dysfunctional
families such as growing up with a family member or close friend with an addiction or mental illness.
They may have also experienced a childhood trauma that led them to feel anxious
and lowered their self-esteem.
Attachment styles; if your needs were not met as a child, you're more likely to
develop insecure attachment relationships.
It is important to remember that anyone can fall into an unhealthy relationship pattern.
Overcoming Codependency:
The first in rescuing yourself from codependent tendencies is to focus on self-awareness. This can be done on your own or through therapy.
Build your self-esteem through empowering hobbies and goals.
Learn how to set and maintain boundaries.
Actively work on openly communicating your needs and wants.
Don't be afraid to say “no” when you don't want to do something.
Seek activities outside of your relationship and invest in new healthier friendships.
Surround yourself with people in balanced and sustainable relationships.
References:
Codependency: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/codependency
Codependency: Signs and Symptoms
Co-Dependency:
What causes Codependency?
How to spot the signs of Codependency:
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